Man Sweat
“Researchers have already shown that ‘man sweat’ can elicit some unusual physiological responses in some women: an increased heart rate, a better mood, and sexual arousal.”
– Newsweek
Mmm, what’s that smell? Is that man sweat? I feel aroused. I feel frisky. Blood is rushing to my nether regions and I’m thinking about horses, muscular horses, galloping, and hard men on ships like pirates but with nicer teeth sailing to tropical island getaways in unbuttoned blouses, and my nipples are sweating from the smell of man sweat, my tongue is sweating. I am frisky. I want some ass. I’m horny from man sweat. Please don’t shower tonight after your touch football game. Don’t waste it, that smell of sexy gets me wasted. Lift your arm and get me high. I will drown and die in your armpits tonight if you let me. I will feed you beers in gold goblets on my upturned bottom after two hours of 24 Hour Fitness on Tuesday and Thursday nights. My glasses will fog and I will twirl my hair and eat your man sweat on a biscuit in bed for breakfast plain, with no jam, just man sweat on my lips, and you smelling so nice riding on a muscular horse with your shirt unbuttoned down to your big brass belt buckle.
We will have sweaty sexy sex in the woods, among moose, chipmunks, and two hundred and twelve varieties of birds including mostly woodpeckers and owls. Rub your armpits on my butt. I will sniff you like exotic glue and eat you all preschool childlike without spitting you out and making a yuck face. Let it flow, my bulging throbbing man mountain. My nose can’t wait. Run to me. Run to me from your place three miles away. Drink a lot of water. Sweat for me. Do it. I need your man sweat to have climaxes like nuclear right now. Do it. Run to me. I’m so sweaty hot.